Top 5 Mind-Boggling Predictions 2018 - Results

In January 2018, I made 5 bold predictions for the upcoming year.  Well it's time to review and I'm sorry to report none of them came to fruition.  Following are the predictions along with a brief synopsis of reality.

5. Prince Harry Left at the Altar  

With the world watching, Prince Harry is stranded at the altar when fiancé Meghan Markle fails to walk down the aisle at their Royal Wedding.

A horse drawn carriage, driven by country music star Kenny Chesney, is seen speeding away from Windsor Castle with a white-laced train caught in the door.

What really happened: Wedding vows exchanged without a hitch - then Meghan begins a life-long hat battle with Kate Middleton.

4. Justin Timberlake Plays Polkas at Super Bowl Half Time

Justin Timberlake shocks fans at Super Bowl Lll when he takes the stage wearing a blue houndstooth vest and Bohemian peasant cap.

Instead of singing “Can’t Stop This Feeling,” Timberlake straps on an accordion and belts out a medley that includes the “Beer Barrel” and  “Doghouse” polkas.

What really happened: No polka.  Re-mixed pop hits and dance moves seen by 106 million viewers, except this one, who was preparing buffalo pickle chips.

3. Network News Read by Talking Horses

Television networks, fed up with the inappropriate behavior of staff, decide to have the news read by horses.  

CNN starts the trend by bringing in a Clydesdale to fill in on weekends, the trend continues throughout the year with sport goats and weather pigs.

What really happened: No talking horses,  but controversy  abound, as Megyn Kelly is fired for making comments about blackface and Halloween costumes.


2. N. Korean Platoon Defects; Wins Olympic Curling Gold

A group of North Korean soldiers defect to South Korea carrying brooms and heavy stones. 

Years of sweeping and cleaning in harsh conditions pay off as the team takes gold in a nail-biting final against Sweden.

What really happened:  No defections.  No Medals.  But N. Korea seeks to add ice Ping Pong to next winter games.

1. Anti-Aging Drug Turns Millions of Americans Into Babies

A new drug that hyper-reverses the aging process sweeps across America.  The drug, known as “Springtime,” is initially prescribed by physicians to “knock a few years off,” but when taken in large quantities can morph a user into a toddler within hours.

The FDA scrambles to halt distribution, but not before over 2.75 million people become infants.

What really happened:  No new miracle drug - you're just a year older.

Follow me on Twitter: @garygeorgevich for more breaking news and insight

https://twitter.com/garygeorgevich

Top 5 Mind-Boggling Predictions for 2018

Prince Harry Left at the Altar  

With the world watching, Prince Harry is stranded at the altar when fiancé Meghan Markle fails to walk down the aisle at their Royal Wedding.

A butler and footman scramble to find the bride-to-be while waiters swing through the crowd with plates of roaming appetizers, including mini jacket potatoes and chorizo prawn skewers.

Reality sets in when a horse drawn carriage, driven by country music star Kenny Chesney, is seen speeding away from Windsor Castle with a white-laced train caught in the door.

The relationship officially ends for Harry and Meghan after the couple is seen yelling at each other at a Pizza Hut in Piccadilly Circus.

Justin Timberlake Plays Polkas at Super Bowl Half Time

Justin Timberlake shocks fans at Super Bowl Lll when he takes the stage wearing a blue houndstooth vest and Bohemian peasant cap.

Instead of singing “Can’t Stop This Feeling,” Timberlake straps on an accordion and belts out a medley that includes the “Beer Barrel” and  “Doghouse” polkas.

Chaos ensues.   

Dancers try to improvise a two-step hop.  Band members scramble to find a clarinet and tuba.  Speakers blare, “I don’t want her, you can have her, she’s too fat for me!”

Afterward, Timberlake apologizes for the unexpected switch.

“I’ve always liked polkas,” he says, smiling, “I guess this may have not been the time.”

Network News Read by Talking Horses

Television networks, fed up with the inappropriate behavior of staff, decide to have the news read by horses. 

CNN starts the trend by bringing in a Clydesdale to fill in on weekends, then quickly expands the hoofed anchor to full-time duties.

Of course the loveable mammals only chew hay on camera, as an intern dubs over the audio, but ratings shoot through the roof.

Soon NBC, CBS, ABC, and Fox all have full-time thoroughbreds reading the top stories of the day.

The trend continues throughout the year with sports being read by goats and weather by pigs.

N. Korean Platoon Defects & Wins Olympic Curling Gold

A group of North Korean soldiers defect to South Korea across the demilitarized zone in heavy fog while riding on Hoverboards.

The soldiers, carrying brooms and heavy stones, make the dangerous journey to compete in the Winter Olympics curling event.  

Years of sweeping and cleaning in harsh conditions pay off as the team takes gold in a nail biting final against Sweden.

After the win, the team travels to America where they refuse a visit to the White House.

Anti-Aging Drug Turns Millions of Americans Into Babies

A new drug that hyper-reverses the aging process sweeps across America. 

The drug, known as “Springtime,” is initially prescribed by physicians to “knock a few years off,” but when taken in large quantities can morph a user into a toddler within hours.

The FDA scrambles to halt distribution, but not before over 2.75 million people become infants.

The sudden influx of newborns puts a heavy strain on family and relatives, who now have to buy cribs and find daycare for their loved ones.

To add insult to injury, caregivers cannot claim the children as dependents on their 2018 taxes.

The drug is made illegal by mid year, but underground shipments still pour in from Peru and are doled out from PEZ dispensers.

Follow me on Twitter: @garygeorgevich for more breaking news and insight

https://twitter.com/garygeorgevich