Sunday, June 26, 2016

Top 3 Things To Say At A High School Graduation Party



As you make the rounds at high school graduation parties, poking over the three-bean dip under a rented tent, you may have the unfortunate experience of coming face to face with the college-bound honoree.


What do you say?

“How 'bout that new Drake tune, it rocks.”

No.  You’re not cool.

Instead offer the young optimist some guidance.  

Be concise and quick, as the youngster may have a long night of celebration and debauchery ahead.

Following is a list of advice that may enlighten the graduate. 

Pick A “Pocket Protector” Career

This is a no brainer.  Tell the graduate to choose a job that requires the use of a pocket protector.

This simple advice may immediately point the student in the direction of an engineer, computer programmer, or scientist.

At the same time, dissuade him or her from becoming a professional wrestler. 

The graduate may stare at you blankly, but will thank you years from now when their job doesn’t entail getting smashed over the head with a stool.

Even if college isn’t in their future, suggest a pocket protector anyway.  People will think they’re intelligent.

And that’s half the battle.

Create An Oddball Social Media Alias

College is fun.  Heck, real fun. 

But it’s important to keep the fun times private.  As well as your identity.  

Employers searching social media may not want their next hire to be the “King of Beer Pong" on the Carnival Fantasy.

So tell the high school alumnus to ditch their real Facebook name and create a new identity to throw snoopy employers off the trail.

Be creative.  Possible aliases include:

Don Corleone
Salamander F.
Hitchcock III
Brussel S. Prout

Get a Grip

What they may not teach in high school is the importance of a firm handshake.   In fact, with the proliferation of fist pumping, the graduate may have never shaken hands.   

Test this hypothesis by extending your palm face-in toward the graduate and count to three.  If you’re met with confusion, it’s time to explain the value of this once preferred custom.

A firm handshake projects confidence and trust.  A weak handshake, or “wet fish” projects weakness. 

If time allows, demonstrate the greeting using role-playing.

“Hello,” you should say, while offering your palm, “I’m so and so.”

If nothing else, the graduate will shake your hand quickly, and move hurriedly on to other guests.

And you can get back to the buffet table.




No comments:

Post a Comment