Sunday, February 11, 2018

Humor Rewind by Gary George - A Week Glance at News February 4, 2018 - February 10, 2018



Robert Wagner was named ‘person of interest’ in Natalie Wood’s drowning death after DNA evidence revealed he was 30% Norwegian, 10% German, and 60% Guilty.
L.L. Bean canceled its lifetime return policy after a Pilgrim tried to return a hat buckle.
Joe Kennedy applied too much lip balm during his speech spurring rumors of another ChapStickquiddick.




After hearing Dunkin’ Donuts will eliminate foam cups by 2020, McDonald’s revealed it will stop making foam McNuggets by 2025.
Kid who took Super Bowl halftime selfie with Justin Timberland sued Pepsi for a “crappy 15 minutes of fame.” 
Norovirus spread through the Olympic Village causing officials to change the event from Curling to Hurling.

A Girl Scout from California sold 300 boxes of cookies outside a pot shop, the most popular being the TagaBongs.
U.S. stock market lost more than $3 trillion, but consumers rested easy knowing their Dominos carry-out pizza was insured.  

Amazon teamed up with other corporate giants to form a healthcare company that will offer EchoCardiograms.





During State of the Union Address, Trump took credit for Liberating Paris.
Also promised to remove ‘From Justin to Kelly’ from Netflix.
The temperature at the Winter Olympics was so cold the ice dancers decided not to shave their legs.


Justin Timberlake performed at the Olympic Opening Ceremony, then fell while attempting a Triple Axel Booty Pop.
‘North Korea invited South Korea’s president to visit, but demanded he bring a dish to pass.
Olympic skier Al Pine admitted he only made the team because of his name and had never actually seen snow.


Follow me on Twitter: @garygeorgevich for more breaking news and insight

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