In January 2018, I made 5 bold predictions for the upcoming year. Well it's time to review and I'm sorry to report none of them came to fruition. Following are the predictions along with a brief synopsis of reality.
5. Prince Harry Left at the Altar
A horse drawn carriage, driven by country music star Kenny Chesney, is seen speeding away from Windsor Castle with a white-laced train caught in the door.
What really happened: Wedding vows exchanged without a hitch - then Meghan begins a life-long hat battle with Kate Middleton.
4. Justin Timberlake Plays Polkas at Super Bowl Half Time
Justin Timberlake shocks fans at Super Bowl Lll when he takes the stage wearing a blue houndstooth vest and Bohemian peasant cap.
Instead of singing “Can’t Stop This Feeling,” Timberlake straps on an accordion and belts out a medley that includes the “Beer Barrel” and “Doghouse” polkas.
What really happened: No polka. Re-mixed pop hits and dance moves seen by 106 million viewers, except this one, who was preparing buffalo pickle chips.
3. Network News Read by Talking Horses
Television networks, fed up with the inappropriate behavior of staff, decide to have the news read by horses.
CNN starts the trend by bringing in a Clydesdale to fill in on weekends, the trend continues throughout the year with sport goats and weather pigs.What really happened: No talking horses, but controversy abound, as Megyn Kelly is fired for making comments about blackface and Halloween costumes.
2. N. Korean Platoon Defects; Wins Olympic Curling Gold
A group of North Korean soldiers defect to South Korea carrying brooms and heavy stones. Years of sweeping and cleaning in harsh conditions pay off as the team takes gold in a nail-biting final against Sweden.
What really happened: No defections. No Medals. But N. Korea seeks to add ice Ping Pong to next winter games.
1. Anti-Aging Drug Turns Millions of Americans Into Babies
A new drug that hyper-reverses the aging process sweeps across America. The drug, known as “Springtime,” is initially prescribed by physicians to “knock a few years off,” but when taken in large quantities can morph a user into a toddler within hours.
The FDA scrambles to halt distribution, but not before over 2.75 million people become infants.
What really happened: No new miracle drug - you're just a year older.
What really happened: No new miracle drug - you're just a year older.
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