World tensions rose as Kim Jong-Un tweeted that Trump is a “Tiny
Dancer.”
Russian hackers targeted DMV offices in 21 states, but gave up
due to long lines.
Gwen Stefani & Blake Shelton to release Christmas single –
“Hollaback! The Herald Angels Sing.”
Magnitude 3.6 earthquake hit Los Angeles, knocking the spray tan
off two “Dancing with the Stars” contestants.
Kylie Jenner revealed to be pregnant. Baby registry will be at Famous for Being
Famous Footwear.
NFL denied reports that Roger Goodell was in a sewer, trying to
lure fans.
Top
3 Worst Emmy Designers 2017
- Calvin ReKleiner
- Christian DEeyore
- Giorgio Arm & Hammer
Toys ‘R’ Us filed for bankruptcy. Geoffrey the Giraffe said it was hard to see
the forest through the trees.
Today In History, 71 B.C.: Spartacus wrote thank you notes to
fellow soldiers who shouted his name to protect identity.
Trump tweeted that Kim Jong-Un is a “Devil with a Blue Dress
On.”
Hurricane Jose brought ‘dangerous’ surf to New Jersey
shore. The Situation was bad.
Carnival revealed the opening of a zoo for cruise ship towel
animals.
Hurricane Jose left 110% of Puerto Rico without power – even the
parts that didn’t have electricity were down.
France threatened to withdraw from Winter Olympics over South
Korea safety concerns. Judges awarded
them an 8 for Cowardice.
Marilyn Manson said Columbine massacre destroyed his career –
and clumpy drugstore mascara ruined his completion.
North Korean earthquake may have been caused by Kim Jong-Un’s
ego falling out of bed.
Top 4 Garage Sale Tips
- Make sure your sign is waterproof – or you may be having a “Garabage” sale.
- Mark items “as is.” There's no return policy for your grandfather’s hot plate.
- Before using a tackle box for a cash register, remove all of the lures.
- Don’t stand too firm on pricing. If someone offers .25 for the “Best of Bread” LP, take it.
On the heels of Trump disinviting Steph Curry to the White
House, the Humor Rewind has rescinded an
offer for Madonna to join us for lunch at Olive Garden.
For more humor news and views, follow me on Twitter: @garygeorgevich
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