Sunday, January 21, 2018

Humor Rewind by Gary George - A Week Glance at News January 14, 2018 - January 20, 2018


Eating Tide detergent became a dangerous fad, prompting McDonald’s to take laundry pods off their dollar menu.
Bid for paper cup allegedly used by Elvis hit $1,000; appraiser said that was not bad for a Solo artist.
After botched missile alert, Hawaii Emergency Agency hired Steve Harvey to announce future attacks.



Study revealed ‘hot’ yoga was no better for the heart than regular yoga, but both better than Cinnamon Roll Pilates.

Lead singer of the Cranberries died suddenly at 46, but there’s no need to bog you down with the details.
CVS banned photo manipulation for store beauty brands, but will allow Shaq to fake smile in Icy Hot back patch commercial.

Heroic firefighter caught child thrown from burning building, admitted to being relieved after dropping the last four.
Meteor hit the Pontiac Silverdome, structure reportedly still standing.
Man kicked off flight for wearing all his clothes to avoid baggage fee, luckily he had on parachute pants.

Science revealed that rats did no spread the Black Plague, but were still mainly responsible for shuttling down Ming’s Chop Suey.
2017 was second warmest year since 1880, both years recalled fondly by radio journalist Larry King.
Michael Douglas accused of sexual harassment by ex-employee who said the actor was inappropriately romancing the stone.


Kim Kardashian revealed new daughter’s name was Chicago, who will be forever grateful her father Kanye did not grow up in Albuquerque.
Delta tightened rules on comfort animals after giraffe seated in coach ate first class passenger’s salad.
$6 million in chips were stolen from Wynn casino, police still searching for suspects attempting to buy large amounts of salsa.

Britain appointed Minister of Loneliness to tackle health problems caused by isolation – new appointee to work remotely from home.
Student in yoga class who was posed as downward dog started foaming at the mouth, paramedics rushed in to help.
Famous match.com profiles in literature #543:  It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, for a good time call on me after the revolution.
Follow me on Twitter: @garygeorgevich for more breaking news and insight


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